The first time I ever saw Brianna, I knew she was special. I was only about 50% awake from the anesthesia when the nurse brought her to see her mommy. Once I was able to focus and see my baby, she was lying beside me, with the biggest brown eyes and a head full of hair! I kept Tums on the nightstand because of it during my pregnancy. Gnawing on her little fist, she was facing me and looking straight into my eyes as if to say, “So, this is you!”
I prayed to God to make her into a beautiful, sweet, caring, intelligent, and obedient child…not one whom her teachers would loathe. He made her all of those things and more. It’s kind of remarkable, that in spite of changes in our family dynamic, that Brianna understands fully why things are this way. If anything, it’s made her dig even deeper into her studies, and into building her own character. For that, I admire her.
Of all the titles I could possibly bear professionally, none will ever trump, MOTHER. I am not perfect by any means. I don’t pack cute little lunch boxes for school (do sixteen year-olds do that any more anyway?), I work a lot to make ends meet, and shopping just makes me dog tired. What I do ensure with her is the openness to communicate with me. I listen when she needs an ear. I guide her in life, goal setting, and committment to whatever she signs up for. I let her know that the world is limitless and that I support her goals and dreams. I’ve instilled in her that character will get her further in life than anything else. That is a non negotiable!
What amazes me the most is the nuggets of wisdom she gives back to me. Much of it is unsolicited! She believes in me and she chastises me the moment I refer to myself as out of shape or wonder if my clothes fit correctly. If I doubt whether or not I can accomplish things, she says,
“Mom, you’ll never know until you try. So why not?”
She respects me accordingly and understands that money around here is better saved than spent. She loves me because I’m me. She’s embarrassed sometimes because I’m “extra”. But she thinks it’s pretty cool that the other kids think she has a cool mom. I certainly feel good when people tell me how sweet she is and it makes my heart smile.
I’m blessed beyond measure and grateful for the bond I share with my daughter. Hopefully she will look back and read this one day after I’m gone and always remember what a mother’s love feels like. I thank God for transitioning me out of missing my mother’s love so that I am able to give freely as a mother, myself.
Do your kids know that you love them? Do you tell them? Please do. Life is short.